What Do You Expect?

If you expect to feel great, nothing will slow you down. And what is true for you is true for others. Your expectations for others will become what they deliver and achieve. As Gandhi said, “Be the change you wish to see in the world.”

Ziglar, Zig  (2012-01-18). Born to Win: Find Your Success Code (Kindle Locations 2265-2266). AudioInk. Kindle Edition.

Enjoyed the Atlanta Quilt Festival

Have you ever thought of quilting as a hobby?  I grew up with a grandmother who made quilts.  Some of them were so heavy, if you slept under one you would wake up too tired to move.  But, they were beautiful.  I think that's what attracted me to the Atlanta Quilt Festival last year, that and an invitation from one of the quilters who thought I might be interested in displaying my books.  It was a wonderful experience then, and just as wonderful yesterday at this year's opening ceremony.

O.V. Brantley is the spear-head of the Festival and the CEO of the foundation that celebrates her grandmother's love and talent for quilts.  I couldn't help but enjoy the amazing quilts yesterday at the opening ceremony of the Atlanta Quilt Festival at the South Fulton Arts Center. The festival is sponsored by the Clara Ford Foundation and the Hammond House.  These two organizations were gracious enough to invite authors to display their books.  I happily brought my romantic suspense series, The Sperling Chronicles to display and introduce to new fans.

Between chatting with those who love fiction and suspense, I was able to take the time to marvel at the works of those talented quilters. Kudos to those ladies! Their work was not only intricate, delicate, and creative, it exuded the love that went into every stitch. I hope everyone gets a chance to visit the Hammond House and help celebrate these magnificent works of art.

Dilsa Saunders Bailey is the author of two romantic suspense novels about a deadly family feud fueled by a bizarre love triangle.  Look for The Sperling Chronicles:  Dreams Thrown Away and The Sperling Chronicles:  Split Images at Amazon.

Stood Still Long Enough

After all these years, I have realized that though it is okay to want to be a perfectionist, it is even better to accept God’s perfection as is.  There is no reaching that level in a human existence.  That’s a hard lesson.  I know it is for me who had been living and doing at full-throttle with an overloaded plate for so long.  It was inevitable that again, I would crash and burn.  This last time, I had to wonder why.   What was the insane purpose of trying to do everything and trying to be everything to everybody?  The answer, there was no purpose other than one that was selfish.  Selfish in thinking that it was all possible and that it all revolved around me.

In response to this awakening, I began to study to find out my true purpose, one that didn’t center on self.  And boy, did I learn more than I wanted to acknowledge about me.    I won’t go into the details, but only that it has been a conscious struggle to make a decision on the next direction I want to take in my life.  Sure, part of it is how I will be remembered.  What legacy will I leave when I transition from this plane?  Will it merely be about what I wanted and what I achieved for my personal satisfaction?  Who else will be the better for it? 

An answer is slowly developing, much like anything that develops in life.  Life is a series of moments and reflections, of actions taken and no actions taken.   For a few months, I stepped back to be still and to stand down so that my thoughts could gather cohesively and constructively.  How joyful that became.  One day as I was sitting back listening to the sounds of nature in my backyard, it hit me.  My mind was blank.  I was not worried about the list of things I had to complete.  I wasn’t thinking about bills, or relationships I thought could improve.  I was just sitting there, being silent and just being human. 

In today’s world, we brag about being busy or overloaded.  We are addicted to our work lives, social media, and being in the spotlight.  We seek the material with zest and with zeal.  I think along the way, being human has been put in the background, left to the future termed as ‘one day.’  Standing still was a reminder to me to be present always.  Be thankful for the past experiences, the lessons that created us.  And to be thankful for the future, which will bring the new opportunities to experience joy and happiness.  But, if you want to really succeed in life to never forget to be present and to focus on the joy and the happiness already at hand. 

Dilsa Saunders Bailey is the author of The Sperling Chronicles, a romantic suspense series about a deadly family feud fueled by a love triange and a woman's scorn.  Dilsa Saunders Bailey's shares her thoughts in the blog simplydilsa.  Her books can be purchased on Amazon.

Everything Has A Season

I was recently a guest blogger on Renaissance Mom...Here is a copy of my advice to the moms visiting this site:

We have all been there wishing today would be over. Waiting for our dreams, our hopes to come alive, especially when are you a mom juggling kids, work, hockey games, husband, volunteer work, and whew … I am exhausted thinking about it. We have all wanted to finish that degree, take that trip to Maui, or write that book in the midst of our busy every day lives. I’ve been there. It took me twenty years to finally finish my first novel, and by that time I had hit that magic number, age 50, and I was looking back trying to figure out where all the time had flown. I’d raised my two children and had a career in healthcare, but I had this entrenched feeling that I would not be happy until I finished writing that novel.

My little voice kept whispering, do it. Do it! But, my purse that needed a funds reimbursement daily said, no. You have to work to earn money, have a job, I told myself. You can’t sit around writing for the fun of it. I had this image of writers being broke, hungry, chasing after the next check. So I hindered myself a few more years with that negative image. I thought successful writers were the lucky ones, but they were so few that I had no chance. After all, I’d been a manager for twenty years. What would I do without a paycheck and without someone to tell what to do?

I finally decided to jump out of the boat, take a risk. Live without a paycheck. Took my funds and invested in a real estate career. Started selling houses, and boom the market fell through. Oh well. I took my injured ego back to healthcare and decided that if I went out like that again, it would be with something I knew best. I started writing a business plan for a credentialing verification organization. Was thinking about it constantly, you know the adage ‘your thoughts become things.’ One day, I went into my basement to go through some old files to find resources to help me with the business plan, and the first thing I put my hand on was an old version of my soon to be book. That’s when I fully understood, ‘having an epiphany,’ the ‘Aha’ moment as Oprah would say. I was going to finish my book.

Three months later, I was done and realized I was going to have to wait until I found an agent and then I would have to wait until the agent could convince a publishing company to put it on the market. Heck, I was 50-plus. My patience had already worn thin. After finding an editor, I decided to release it myself. I did and I was so proud when the Print-on-Demand publisher I used sent me my first copy of Dreams Thrown Away.

Now, I had the bug and as I look back I had it bad. I went back to my computer and began number two, but life started getting in the way again. I went from one demanding project to another. Couldn’t blame children or husband for distractions anymore, it was all corporate employment demands that filled every minute. And then, I had another epiphany. If I can work long hours for them, I can do it for me. I finished the second novel, a sequel. Decided to rename and re-release the first and went for it. I still have time challenges, but it doesn’t matter. I am in my season. Writing brings me joy whether I earn a penny or a million. I wouldn’t change the time spent on it, even if I could.

But, here’s the kicker. I have no regrets about all the paths I have traveled before getting to this season. Every minute of life is valuable and contributes to the better life ahead. So don’t sweat about your current season, another one is coming.

Happy Father’s Day!!!

Happy Father’s Day to All the Men out there who have raised children, mentored them, supported them, helped them build character, and put smiles on their faces.  Here’s a toast to the ones who have set examples for the types of husbands their daughters will marry and the type of husbands their sons will become. 

We appreciate you! 

Whether you were the biological dad, the step-dad, the grandfather, the uncle, the older brother, or cousin and in many cases, the mom, grandmom, or aunt who had to stand in with the sage advice and the love of a father, you allowed us to stand on your shoulders!

Happy Father’s Day!!!